i do not know if i will ever love the same ever again. perhaps i never did and never will. different people and different ways of loving, but somehow the outcome stays the same. tired, wary, i watch the notes they leave up online. i like to think i’ve left a mark on each one of them, that i’ve somehow made them more emotional and more appreciative of art. one would post love letters online — none to me i guess — and the other would leave their likes upon architecture and film camera posts — my faves…once. the world has become a storage room for a junk-load of stuff imprinted with memories i had with people i once knew how to love. i do not know if i can make it. what is yet to happen if i no longer have a place to hide? if i do not settle for one sooner or later, i might go bankrupt at an early age. what is the point of sharing my favorites with them if it is only to besmirch it at last? i think about how i’ve ruined my favorite songs by sharing. and so now every time i listen to these familiar melodies, i am reminded of them, the time together as of the moment the song embraced the air around.
